It's the End of the Year as We Know It

I've talked quite a bit about goal setting and reviewing the past year here in these articles, and in my daily work. I thought that if I was prescribing this for everyone else, it would probably be a good idea for me to engage in some of the same behavior. So I thought it might be helpful for both you and I if I shared some of my goals for the upcoming year - hopefully you can help me with that much needed accountability, and I can do the same for you.

2010 has been a heck of a ride - both personally and globally. The year had its share of up's and down's - of course, I am hoping for more up's than down's in the next year. I've thought of quite a few goals to help - ironically, I found it easy to write about the theory of effective goal setting a few weeks ago, but not so easy to implement in my own goal-setting; specific, measurable, and time-stamped - let's see if I can do that here. Finally, I get the feeling that there will be plenty of accountability through writing these down - maybe more than I bargain for.

A New Direction Counseling website and newsletter make-over. That's right, it's time to update and revamp the website and newsletter. I'm not sure what it will look like for sure - I've got a bunch of ideas dancing around - but it's going to be different. If not by the end of March 2011, then I expect some loud and obvious 'accountability' directed my way.

More opportunities for "Take Home Therapy" in the new site. I had quite a bit of fun creating the Food and Your Mental Health audios. I've got quite a few ideas to offer assistance when it comes to your mental health and wellness, and that of your family, short of coming in to my office. I think 2011 is the year to share more of those ideas. So, by the close of 2011, expect at least two new opportunities for "Take Home Therapy" available on the website. I'm not sure if that will come in the form of audio, video, or printed material, but it will be something - two somethings - by the end of the year.

Let me ask you, what are some topics or ideas you would like to see covered in a "Take Home Therapy" section outside of this newsletter? What do you think would benefit our communities? Feel free to email or comment with your ideas.

A book. Maybe two. From inside my head, to a bound collection of paper - or something more electronic in its representation, like an E-book. I've been putting this off for too long, and now 2011 is the year I will do it. It may be as simple as a collection of articles from over the years, things I have printed here or not. Then again, it could be original work along the lines of the Family Plan idea I've been sketching out - it could be both. Either way, you will see 1-2 books / e-books from me in 2011. If they are not in your hand within 370 days - I would appreciate a large amount of accountability.

Finally, one more half-marathon. May 2011. I'm already registered, now I only need to get to the starting line then to the finish line with a few miles in between. This time around, I hope to maintain my streak of beating my training partner - which should be too hard, as I would assume he is reading this article with a donut in one hand, and the tv remote in the other hand. This time around, I'd like to train consistently enough to beat my previous outings by at least a few minutes. It's been three years since I wasn't even able to run for one sustained minute. To celebrate, I'd like to beat my old time by 3-minutes. That's as simple as following the training schedule that starts in January. I'm going to need some accountability and discipline for that.

Four BIG goals - two by the end of the year; two in the first half of the year. I can do it. It's going to be a lot of work, but it will be worth it.

What about you?

What are your BIG goals for next year? Have you started planning yet? Have you written them down and thought about how to hold yourself accountable? Who will help you with your accountability?

Enjoy the rest of 2010. Make a great new year.

5 Tips for a Happy and Healthy Holiday

Many of us are wrapping up our holiday preparations – or anxious pressing full-steam-ahead to complete them. This is a time of year characterized by time with family, time away from work, and a celebration of family traditions and our spiritual life.

It is also a time of year characterized by stress and some unhealthy behaviors. Here are a few suggestions to prevent the stress from getting to you, and to help insure you have a Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays.

- Indulge often, but in moderation. You know this is the time of year when we have some of those special treats that are only brought out for the holidays – cookies and desserts we remember from childhood, traditional family meals, all those things that make the holidays special. Enjoy them – treat yourself – a little bit. Trying to avoid all of those goodies will only make you grumpy and difficult to be around; eating them with reckless abandon will make you feel guilty and bloated; but finding the right bit of moderation to sample is the key to enjoying holiday food.
- Embrace the pace. Whether you have a whirlwind of travel plans to visit every family member in one day, or a relaxed day at home, know what the day holds, and prepare for it. Whatever your traditions for the holidays, whatever your plans; prepare for them, embrace them, and enjoy.
- Spend wisely. You may have read this previously, but it bears repeating – there is no more sure-fire way to cause yourself undue holiday stress, than to spend too much or to leverage your credit cards for holiday gifts. Spend smart, and go in to 2011 with a solid financial plan.
- Enjoy family traditions – or start some new ones. Traditions help to keep us grounded and connected to our past, and to important relationships – starting new traditions builds new connections with family and friends.
- Have realistic expectations – there are few, if any, times in life where everything is “perfect”, yet we still have at tendency to aim for it – which can often be one of the greatest stressors we put ourselves through during the holidays. Rather than trying to make everyone happy with the “perfect” gift and a “perfect” gathering; set goals for what is “good enough” for you and your family.

Enjoy! Maybe that should be the easiest and most obvious tip. Whatever you do, whomever you are with, where ever you are – have a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

How to Design a Successful New Year's Resolution

2010 is coming to a close – there’s still quite a few days left to be enjoyed in the year, and I hope you are making plans to have a wonderful close to 2010. It is usually this time of year when we start talking about “resolutions” for next year . OK, so most of us don’t start
thinking about these resolutions for a few more weeks, but if you want them to be successful, I’m here to encourage you to start thinking about your goals now, versus on December 31st.

What factors help to make a goal successful? Or, a better question may be, how can you insure that you will be successful in YOUR goals in 2011?

Your goal should be specific and measureable. If you want to lose weight or become healthier, it is helpful to define what that means in specific and measureable terms. How much weight do you want to lose? What, specifically, does it mean to be “healthier” – less fast food, more veggies, a combination of both? If you want to put yourself in a better financial situation, how do you plan to do that? Will you save more? How much? Will you spend less? How much less? The first step in setting a goal and working towards success is to make that goal specific and measureable.

The next biggest factor in insuring your goal is successful is to put an expiration date on it – time stamp it – put it on the calendar. By adding a sense of time and urgency, you encourage yourself to break down the goal into bite-sized chunks over smaller periods of time. If you want to lose 20 pounds, when do you want to lose it by; March? June? Next year? 20 pounds in two months is an average of 2.5 pounds per week; extending that goal out 6 months makes it even easier. But the bottom line is setting a time limit helps you to make a more realistic weekly break-down. This works just as easily for financial goals – whether saving or paying down debt – by setting a measureable goal with a time-stamp, you can break it down into smaller, manageable chunks.

Finally, one key factor in achieving your goals is to build in accountability. You can be accountable to yourself by writing the goal down and reviewing your progress every week – you can also incorporate a variety of tools – there are tons online and just as many you can put on your phone for weight-loss, exercise, calorie counting, financial saving, etc. Sometimes, adding accountability is as simple as asking a trusted friend or companion to hold you accountable to your goal, or to work with you on the same goal.

Have a great holiday season, Merry Christmas, and good luck in the new year.

Are You the World's Worst Boss?

Complain about your boss all you want, you might be an even worse boss. In fact, you might be The World’s Worst Boss. At least that was the message in a recent article I read by Seth Godin. You can read the full article here: http://bit.ly/dTb78J . In it, he shares a variety of reasons why you might be the world’s worst boss – I really encourage you to read the whole thing, as I’m going to focus only on two words he wrote in the article, the idea of “managing yourself”.

As the article says, there are quite a few books available on the science and business of managing others, not so many on managing yourself. Even with that, managing others is a tough task – ask anyone who has to do it on a daily basis.

But what about the idea of managing yourself? There aren’t as many books out there on that topic, if there are any at all. We seem to live in a time when managing yourself is a necessary life-skill, but NOT managing yourself is the standard.

What would it look like if you were a better manager of yourself?
Managers have the responsibility of appropriately managing a variety of resources. How do you manage your resources?

How do you manage your time? Are you overworking yourself, or not using time effectively?

What about your finances – do you have enough coming in, or too much going out?
How do you manage the “natural resources” you have, like food?

Are you effectively managing your “culture”, your social connections?

Are you a good boss? How would you assess your performance and how you manage your self?