5 Ways to Help Your Child in a Techno-Crazy World

I had one heck of a wake-up call this week. Hopefully you are more up-to-date with all this stuff than I am, especially if you have older children. If not, I hope this helps.




I remember a time when I used to think I was pretty knowledgeable about pop-culture and technology. I was hip. Yeah, back when hip meant cool and wasn't something that ached when I ran. I knew about technology when there was only one video-game platform and it allowed you to play against the guy sitting next to you, not the guys sitting in Australia.



Technology has made the world smaller and faster. We can now connect with others around the world and learn the answers to questions in an instant from anywhere at any time. This is certainly a great and wonderful thing.



Except, when it is not.



We've all heard the stories of kids who meet "the wrong people" through social networks; or ran up a $7,000 texting bill, or the child who spends more time playing video games than sleeping, eating, or studying combined.



There are a few very simple parenting basics that apply to this area of life for you and your family. Here are some tips to help your child navigate our techno-crazy world in a healthy way, and maybe help you learn something in the process.



Know what your children are doing online.



I thought I knew what "social media" was - twitter, linked in, facebook - those kinds of things I use every week either personally or professionally. As a "narrow-minded adult", I thought that was the whole of social media - boy was I wrong! There are social networks a-plenty out there! All of which you can access through your computer, laptop, or tablet, and most of which can be accessed through a phone.



Know which ones your child or teen is on. Know what they are doing on them. Know what kind of pictures of themselves they put on these sits. Know who they talk to and why they talk to them. Be a part of your child's online life - be there friend on Facebook, but be there parent in the real world. That means asking your child to be a part of their social networking world, or seeing what they do in these networks.



Set limits.



Setting limits comes right after you know what your child is doing - setting limits is the difficult part for a lot of parents, because we may be too interested in being our child's friend both on Facebook and off. Adolescence is a normally stage of development where children will test limits and push boundaries; it is a loving act to respectfully and responsibly set limits for your child.



This may come in the form of limiting time playing video games, limiting internet time, limiting texts, etc. If your child is spending excessive amounts of time in any of these areas, they are likely to be missing out in other areas. Current research indicates is mixed as too how much teens are texting - but all research agrees, it's quite a bit, somewhere in the 100-200 / day range. If your child is engaging in that much texting, or playing video games for 4-8 hours every night, what areas of life are they missing out on? Setting limits, and explaining why, is the loving thing to do.



Share the cost of technology.



What a precious gift - the ability to understand the nature of work, money, and the true cost of goods. There is nothing wrong with asking your child to pitch in for that new phone they want - owning and using a cell phone is a privilege (a very convenient one for parents, true) not a birthright. Owning the latest and greatest Iphone or Droid is one heck of a privilege, one that can be used as a teaching privilege. The same rings true for any purchase, your child would like to make. Encouraging them to work hard - either at a real job, or around the house - to earn all or part of that purchase introduces them to "the real world", where we all have to work to acquire what we need or want.



Teach them to type.



This can be a direct idea - especially for younger kids - or more of a philosophy in general.



For younger children, there are tons of opportunities for them to learn how to type - you can access a variety of fun and education learn-to-type tools on the internet, allow your child to work on them little-by-little every few days, and they will have it down. It is become increasingly obvious that children are going to need this ability earlier than we ever did.



I remember asking my mom to type my first "research paper" back in 5th grade - I was amazed at her skill on the "typewriter" - that old thing with the keys, arms, and ink. I took my first "keyboarding class" late in college, it helped considerably after several painstaking years typing by 'hunt and peck. My children are already being asked to do research and type papers far earlier than I ever did. They are going to need this skill - help your young children learn it. They are already interested in what you are doing on that machine, let them have their time on it and benefit from it.



The more "philosophical" idea is to teach your children and teens the "right" way to use their technology. This happens through the conversations you have with them about your expectations for their use of tech, as well as the role-modeling you do.



This philosophical also applies to teaching them the appropriate use of social media and your expectations as a parent. I often coach kids and families that social media is a great place to connect, but not always the best place to vent frustrations (or vulgarities) about friends, family, or coworkers. It's amazing how long that stuff lasts.



Spy on your kids.



Sort of. I don't mean this in a James Bond 007 kind of way, but in the way that your child knows that you are always lovingly keeping your eye on them. Check your computer, and phone, and their phone to make sure they are doing what they say they are doing. Have conversations with them about your expectations and check to make sure that they are living within those expectations and guidelines in the real world, and in the world of technology.



It used to be enough for a parent to check their teens dresser drawer for items that were considered "family contraband". Today, there are a lot more places than a dresser drawer, and a lot more things a family might consider "contraband".