Be the Best

"Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you". - Ralph Waldo Emerson.

There is a fundamental human need in each of us to become the best we can be. To be the best "what" is often the question - the best man, best woman, best father, best mother, best wife, best husband, best business person, best doctor, best manager, best teacher, best widget maker, best cook, best tv-watcher, best athlete, best non-athlete, best whatever. Each one means something different to different people. But the fundamentals remain the same; we all have an innate drive, a motivation to strive. A desire to be the best we can be.

Abraham Maslow called it a desire for "self-actualization". You may remember reading about Maslow and his hierarchy of needs years ago in an introductory psychology class, or high school biology class. He theorized that we all have this drive towards self-actualization, but that it takes considerable work and effort to get there; after all, you don't just wake up one morning the best widget-maker or best athlete in the world, it takes time, work, education, practice, failing, doing to get there - contrary to what most 3am info-mercials may tell you....

Maslow simplified the effort to get there - to reach self-actualization - into a hierarchy of needs, a series of steps to get there; often seen as a pyramid, with each layer being a necessary foundation to achieve the next layer, or goal:










Maslow believed we must first have our basic physiological needs taken care of - do we have enough food to eat and roof over our head? If we do, we feel safe and secure and can build further security. Through the process of building security, the goal is to develop a sense of belonging - often in a family, work group, or intimate relationship. If we are able to achieve this belonging we will develop esteem, and hopefully, eventually work on becoming the best we can be, or achieve self-actualization.

His ideas continue to indicate there will be hiccups along the way - obstacles to achieving these goals - can be the cause of frustration, stress, and distress in our lives. If we are not able to have our basic human needs met, or if we cannot procure the resources needed to feel secure, we cannot move to building relationships or developing esteem. If we are unable to have healthy relationships or do not have a sense of respect for others, we will not move on towards being the best we can be.

Maslow's Hierarchy is a great tool to use to look at our selves - to determine where the obstacles might be in our lives, and how we can work to move past them.

Maslow didn't believe that many people reach the pinnacle of his pyramid. He thought the obstacles were too many, and that we were not able to overcome them to move on.

I take a different view. I believe that sometimes just knowing that self-actualization exists, and that we can achieve it, is motivating. By looking at our lives and determining where the obstacles are, we can work through them and move towards becoming the best we can be.

Where are you today in Maslow's Hierarchy? How are you moving past obstacles in your life? Are you on your way to achieving self-actualization?